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Q: How many tournament players does it take change a light
bulb?
A: Only one, but he needs a ref to "Check it, check it, check it, check it . . .
Q: What follows two days of rain?
A: Monday.
The last tournament I was on was SO rigged . . .
-How rigged
was it?
-It was so rigged, the local team had SO many five man teams that
they had run out of normal colours
to differentiate them. In fact,
they were up to Field Team Midnight Salmon Sunrise Indigo.
Q: How can you tell when you've played far too much recreational
paintball?
A: When you're hit with something tossed at you and your
immediate response is to yell, "Bounce!
No break!".
Q: How can you tell when you've played far too much tournament
paintball?
A: When you toss something to someone, and it hits them, your
immediate response is "Check him, check
him, check him . . ." .
Q: How can you tell the difference between an NPPL ref and
a normal person, when they're lying dead on the road?
A: The normal person has the skid marks BEFORE the body.
Q:What's the difference between a rec game and a tournament
game?
A: About 3,000 paintballs.
What's the difference between a tournament ref and an onion?
A:
Nobody cries when you cut up the ref.
Q: What's the difference between an Ultimate Judge and
God?
A: God doesn't think He's an Ultimate Judge.
Q: What's the difference between a good player and a bad player?
A: Twenty five seconds.
Q: Why do tournament players say "Check him, check him . .
."?
A: Because "I hit that guy on the loader" has too many syllables.
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